my prayer for tonight...

God,
I thank you for this life you have given me...
You are such an awesome God...

I pray for my friends...
Guide and direct their lives...
provide for their needs...
speak to their hearts and be real in their lives...
convict their hearts..

I pray for my family...
Help my family be humble...
give them the strength to get through the day...
work in their hearts...
open their minds...

I pray that you will help my faith grow...
Help me grow into the man you've created me to be...
Help me love others, because I know I can't love them on my own...


I love you Father!
You are so good!
I don't know how I've done it without you before..
You are our all in all.

Amen.

the first night back...

The first day back home has been an interesting one...

It was good to be with my family and just hang out with them for most of the day...

but then I was reminded of the darkness that this house has...

It's like i can sense that Satan has some control over certain people in my family...

and that is tough for me to see...
and hear...
and it's tough for me to remember...

I don't like remembering...

but at the same time it's so awesome to see where God has taken me from and put me today!



Thank you God for what you've done in my life,
may you do the same for my family...

the weekend that was...

It's been a wild last week in my life..

I went from thinking I had an internship to not having an internship to being jobless for the summer to all of the sudden being offered a job I already declined earlier in the year to taking that job...

It's crazy what can happen in a week...

Last weekend was pretty intense for me...
I fasted 2 out of 3 days and was in constant prayer the whole time...
I was searching for God to speak..
And He did...
I had to sit in solitude for like 3 hours just meditating on The Word...

I did things this weekend I usually don't do and I had faith that God would speak...

These are just some things that I put in my notebook throughout the weekend...

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I crave the easiest path through life, but I yearn for my Father even more.

Am I willing to serve God no matter what? Even if I feel uncomfortable? Even if it's not my first choice of service?

Am I willing to simply love the people God places in my life? Or am I trying to choose which people I want to love?

"God has always connected our relationships with Him to our relationships with one another." - Francis Chan

Joshua 1:9

"As you conquer your territory... do not be alarmed... these things must happen...His plan is taking place" Pastor J.R. Pittman

God's will is not my will sometimes. Why do I think I need to be comfortable in order for it to be God's will? Maybe because for so long I've been comfortable in my surroundings. I asked God to stretch me and this is how He is doing it, by making me feel uncomfortable, by making me step out in faith.

Being uncomfortable = using my faith
Am I really wanting to use my faith??

Joshua 1:9 (again!!)

control issues

I sure do have some control issues!!! I don't know what my deal is...
Probably a lot of it has to do with not being in the Word as much as I need to be...
I feel like I can take control of things on my own power, but every time I start to take control without God's help things start turning sour.

God,
I need you to take control!!! I'm sick of failing at life just because I think I know what's best. You are my Savior and I believe you can save me from myself. Take my pride! Take my selfishness! Take my relationships! Take everything I do and let it be glorifying to You!!!!

"...loved him as he loved his own soul..."

I was reading 1 Samuel 20 tonight and was challenged by the story that this chapter talks about...

In case you're not familiar with 1 Samuel 20 let me tell you what it's about...

David is a wanted man...
he is wanted by King Saul...
but King Saul's son Jonathan is best friends with David and does not want to see his friend die...
So the friends make a promise to each other...
Jonathan promises David that he will not die, but that he will do whatever it takes to save his friends life....

It's friendship at its finest...

there is a verse that really stuck out to me and it goes something like this...
"Now Jonathan caused David to take another vow, because he loved him; for he loved him as he loved his own soul."

to think that these two friends can have such a great friendship really challenged me to consider my "friendship" with God...

Do i love God as much as my own soul??

Am I putting God above everything else in my life??

Am I giving God each day??

Am I allowing God to be able to use me or am I stuck in selfishness??

My prayer is that I can love God so much that there is no way I can find happiness in anything else this life offers....

greater things??!!

I was really hit hard by this passage this morning...
It definitely made me think about my motives and request towards God...

Jesus is speaking here...
“I tell you the truth, anyone who believes in me will do the same works I have done, and even greater works, because I am going to be with the Father. You can ask for anything in my name, and I will do it, so that the Son can bring glory to the Father. Yes, ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it!"

to think that those who believe in Jesus can do things even greater than He did...

When i think about that it makes me question how deep my faith is...
Am i fully aware of what God can do through me when I completely give my total self to Him??

My hope and prayer is that my faith will grow more and more every day...
I want to see miracles happen! I want to be used by God in such a way that there's not doubt in others mind that I am a Jesus follower!

God,
Use me. Make my faith stronger. Let your will be done.

"Without Me you can do nothing"

Humbleness is something God has been trying to teach me...
I have a tendency to think I can do it on my own...
I start to think "I don't need help"...

Last night I was reminded of something though, and it has been pounding on my heart all day today too...

Jesus said,
"Without Me you can do nothing"
(John 15:5)

As I read those words it started to dawn on me that there are things in my life that I think I can do without Jesus being in control.
I think that I can handle it and Jesus doesn't need to take care of this or that...
"I got it!"
That's what I think...
maybe I'm crazy
or maybe you do that too...

I know that after I read this passage of Scripture and started praying about what it is that God was wanting to have control of I started to really feel convicted that He needs to be taking care of some more things...
things that I used to think I could take care of..

I can't take care of those "little" things on my own anymore...


God,
I pray that you take control of the things in my life that I don't think I need your help in. I know that without you I can do nothing, so i ask that you invade my life and take away my pride...
I need you Father! Be my everything!